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SupremeJester

Just can't take it any more

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I'm sorry, but I need to let this out.  

 

My sister has had a heart dysfunction for about 6 years.  3 years ago she was diagnosed with breast cancer.  They eventually too off both breasts.  It reestablished itself as bone only cancer.  My sister had to make the choice.  Use medication for her heart, Which would kill her  if she didn't.  OR go on to chemo which the cancer will kill her if she doesn't.  She was treating the cancer.  And then the heart problem because to much.  About Christmas time she switched to no more chemo, and the doctor gave her about 2 months depending on how fast the cancer grows.  

 

Saturday I was called over from my brother in law early in the morning.  I rushed to her house and saw that my sister was alive and coherent but wasn't speaking well.  She couldn't breathe.  And her husband kept asking her to go into the hospital but she wouldn't.  Finally she breathed out that we needed to roll her.  So we did.  And as we started she began to wail, and scream, and cry.  It hurt her so bad. but we got some shorts on her and her shirt halfway on and she finally began to talk again.  She was in extreme pain obviously and she didn't have function of he arms or legs.  I laid with her until she fell asleep.  

 

Later that night she was taken to the hospital, they have given her drugs to the point where she doesn't know up from down.  I'm at a loss for words.  My sister and I were close, her husband is one of my best and longest lasting friends.  I'm sure she will get to go home.  But she is fighting and it's killing me. 

 

Thank you OD for gaming with me the past couple nights. 

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Sorry to hear bud. Keep your head up. 

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25 minutes ago, Collin(OD) said:

Sorry to hear bud. Keep your head up. 

thanks for playin a game with me last night. know im not greatz but it was fun. and i learned.

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Damn dude.. sounds like I need to drive down there and take you for a beer bro... I am sorry this kind of shit is hard to go through if you need anything lmk.

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Hey youuu

 

I'm sorry that our TS conversation was cut short, my internet decided to give up on being internet for a period of time. 

 

Keep your head up friend, if you ever need someone to chat with or just someone who will listen, you know I'm here just the same as you're here for me. 

 

Also, we should game sometime ;)

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My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. Take it easy man!

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Im so sorry to read this jester my heart breaks for you and your family if you need to chat you know im always here ok or just msg me on facebook :)

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Sorry to hear about this brotha

Shoot me a message if you'd like to talk about it or do the opposite and play to forget.

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Hey man, I'm really sorry to hear what you're going through. We've talked before briefly about health stuff. Having to see your family members go through this crap sucks. I've been there. Still am with some family members. If you ever need to talk to someone. I sadly can understand what you're going through.  

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I can feel your pain oozing through my computer screen.  It's so tragic for anybody to have to go through so much.  I cried as I read what you posted.  I too lay in the bed next to my husband as he writhed in pain with the cancer eating him up.  Trying everything I could to relieve him from the agony.   The only thing that helped me during this time was knowing he knew I was there.  I could see it in his eyes, feel it in his hand as I sat with him.  Be positive for her as you are doing.  Life is so damn precious we can't afford to waste any of it.  My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family.

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Thank you all.  

 

Update, she has Influenza A.  I went to see her and she is just out of it.  Started talking to me about skittles, then andes mints, then nurses came in because she had told them her catheter had come out.  But it hadn't.  She is not there. Just so many meds trying to keep her pain down. 

 

I ended up going for a run and a jog.  My mom ended up taking everything off the walls and is now repainting the front room.  My dad is driving to Denver for work.  I dunno. 

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it's hard to see a family member in a bad situation. i can relate with my mother almost dying on me like 4-5 times from strokes and watching diabetes destroy her body and shes only 53, its rough. one thing that helps me is just talking to my mom and putting at least a smile on her face. take all that emotional pain you feel and turn it into positivity for them. get her mind focused on good things and motivate her to fight the good fight. motivation is contagious and it will help her go through the day. for me, i know that yeah it sucks but don't make it suck for them because they are in the worst spot, always be mindful of them. i'm not a fan of the whole narcotic scene with medical these days since its only temporary and it makes them feel like total crap. hopefully your sister is more responsive after the docs figure out to reduce the pain without the meds. don't rush these things either, take a step at a time so you don't feel overwhelmed or helpless, patience is key.

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You'll be in my prayers. Hard to see family go through anything. I've been where you are now before. You'll get through it and just keep praying. I do not know if you believe in God or not but he can do amazing things. 

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There is no easy route through your circumstances, it is a difficult situation to be in. However it is important that you balance your moments of stress with your moments of calm and relaxation to the best that you can. It is a hard thing to do sometimes, but the truth is you can't help anyone if you aren't capable of helping yourself first. You often stop by the Gamer's Lounge channel, but you only ever stay for a few minutes at a time. You should stick around a bit longer next time, have a drink with us (It is a lounge after all, right?) and let the stress of recent ordeals wash away. It isn't selfish to see to your own needs, rather it is instead foolish not to.

 

The failing health or eventual passing of a loved one is an ordeal that we will all have to face at some point in our lives, it is a trial we cannot avoid and it will test us for all that we are. But for the sake of those who are afflicted or cannot follow after it is a test we must overcome. If your sister helped shape you into the person you are today, then today you must be a person that can endure this trial, as there is no better reflection of the true value of her life and the worth of her struggles than in the vivid difference she has made to those around her. We must be the strength of those whose strength is failing, the resilience of those whose resilience is weakening, and the future of those whose future approaches. Until such a day as someone else must be ours for us.

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So the cancer is taking over, and that's what I saw last weekend.  The unbearable pain of cancer taking over her spine.  Then she got to the hospital and acquired influenza A.  She is still there, and it's fairly obvious that she is drugged out most of the time.  I don't think she knows what time it is, she called my mom last night at like 1am.  I ran into her room to listen to the convo.  Very strange, she was very loopy.  But with time things are feeling a little better, just had a rough adjustment seeing her go through all that pain.  

 

Thank you all for your kind words.  @Terra I think I will take some time to have a beer in the lounge.  Recently I've been trying to hit up 7 days and help everyone out in that aspect.  Such a cool feeling to have a community in the game. I've only played it with me and another player, so It has been nice to relax with 4 or 5 people in the game not having to sprint to gather materials. 

 

I need to take some time out for my Nephew.  He is coming off having the flu as well, and last time he saw his mom he thought she was dying.  He is a tough little guy.  I remember the days of wishing to stay home because I was it.  I think about him staying home, and the thought that he might have been the one to get his mom sick, that would be a heavy cross to bear for a 9 year old. 

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